The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.Ī truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance.
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